


Jumping Through Virtual Hoops

by Itsallgoodman



Category: Borderlands (Video Games)
Genre: Angel does a lot of meddling, Ballroom Dancing, Eventual Romance, Eventual Smut, Handsome Jack (Borderlands) Being an Asshole, M/M, Other Additional Tags to Be Added, Parent Handsome Jack (Borderlands), Personal Assistant Rhys (Borderlands), Praise Kink, Rhys is Handsome Jack's Personal Assistant, Rhys is a special boy, Slow Burn, like he's not good but he's trying, like just a lil slow burn
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-06-11
Updated: 2020-06-29
Packaged: 2021-03-04 06:48:04
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 8,629
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24659365
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Itsallgoodman/pseuds/Itsallgoodman
Summary: Angel convinces Jack he needs a PA to help get his life in order. Jack is fine with it as long as he doesn’t have to do any of the actual work in hiring them, and Angel is more than happy to take over the vetting process. But she’s not just hoping to find Jack a PA, she’s trying to find Jack a partner. If she can get him to love again then maybe there's hope.Rhys is just trying not to die, honestly._________Angel is still locked away on Pandora. Rhys is still a data-mining company man. This all takes place sometime between BTPS and BL2.
Relationships: Handsome Jack & Rhys (Borderlands), Handsome Jack/Rhys (Borderlands)
Comments: 22
Kudos: 126





	1. Holographic Waltz

**Author's Note:**

> The set-up here is that Angel is still on Pandora secure. She and Jack aren’t like "functional", but she doesn’t hate him. She just knows he’s broken and thinks getting him to love someone again could heal the wounds that caused her to be imprisoned in the first place. 
> 
> So obviously the logical thing to do is find a hot, smart code monkey and bait the trap, right?

It was getting worse. Jack had vented his third employee in the past two weeks, and it was getting to be a chore for Angel to have to find replacements for them. Not to say that venting the occasional peon wasn't out of the ordinary, it was just that Jack's temperament was getting volatile as construction on Pandora hit more roadblocks.

"Jack…" Angel called out carefully through their secure ECHOnet line. Jack was always a little...touchy after, what Angel had dubbed, a "rage-locking." 

"What?" He snapped. "Haven't got all day Angel. There are a lot more idiots I need to yell at then kill for failing to move the mining project ahead."

Angel looked on at Jack through the Hyperion network. He looked tired even through the mask. Papers were taped up all over his usually pristine office windows obscuring the view of Elpis, and he was sitting in his chair, flipping through project details of the ever-expanding grip Hyperion had on Pandora. 

"Well, I know things have been stressful with the expansion. And I was thinking, what if you got some help?" 

Jack paused. "Are you...telling me to go to therapy?" The tinge of oncoming rage more than evident.

"What? No, I mean like getting a person to help out with your workload and take some stuff off your plate." _Although therapy would be nice_ , she thought. 

Jack started shuffling through his notes. "That's why I have you, baby girl. Besides, I'm pretty sure no one can bring to the table what you got."

"I mean, yes, that's true. I am great. But there are just some practical things I can't do like file a physical paper or get you a cup of coffee, I guess. Plus, I'm kinda already busy myself being your eyes and ears for an entire galaxy." 

Jack looked up. "Why are you so concerned with getting me a coffee monkey, hun?"

Angel could hear the suspicion in his voice. "I'm just worried about you. I mean, of course, I would be happy to come there and do all those things myself…"

"Angel," Jack said sharply in an unmistakable warning. 

"...but since I can't, I want to make sure there's someone there who's taking care of you."

Jack softened and pinched the bridge of his nose. "Listen, sweetheart, I think that's really nice, but I'm okay, really. Your old man is a big boy who can pour his own coffee. I'll try to de-stress some...and maybe vent just a few more emplo-"

"JACK!"

"Sheesh! Okay, okay. Can't a man vent a few marketing executives just to blow off steam anymore?"

There was silence over the ECHOnet. 

Jack gave a sigh with way more drama than necessary. "M'kay. Fine, _fine_. But you have to deal with the hiring. Obviously, I get final approval, and I reserve the right to airlock whomever you choose... That's right I said 'whomever'...cuz I'm classy."

"Thank you, Jack."

"Mhmm, I know. I'm great, your hero, the king of kings yadda yadda just let me get some work done, yeah?"

Angel signed off, smiling. Step one was complete, and project Get-Jack-to-Chill-The-Fuck-Out was underway.

___________________________

A day later, in a much less glamorous part of Helios, company man Rhys was drowning in work.

Every time he looked up from his computer screen in the cubicle he was currently hunkered down in, Rhys swore he could still see lines of code flashing in front of his eyes.

"Uhg," he grunted. "I really need to get up." He muttered to no one in particular as he shifted in his wheeled chair and used his mechanical arm to scratch his neck absentmindedly. Rhys' current project had been a pain in his side for a week now. After some bandits had hit a few of the Hyperion bases on Pandora, there was a call to upgrade the countermeasure features on all of Hyperion's bases. Rhys was currently kicking himself for having volunteered to lead the charge in his division. It had seemed like a great idea at the time, a chance to distinguish himself and get ahead. But he could feel his soul slowly seeping out of this body with each 'Error' message he received after trying to run his code.

After another hour of grinding away at the Hyperion Countermeasure System, he rolled himself back from the desk and walked over to the drink machine in the break room.

_You got this. Just one final breakthrough, and it'll all be worth it. Yeah, you're the MAN. You're. The. Man._

He'd be more ashamed of his self-hyping, but the exhaustion was taking its toll. He scanned his card and selected an iced tea from the drink machine before making his way back to his desk. As he walked up, he was greeted by the unexpected sight of Henderson standing in his little cubicle and making sharp eye contact with one of Rhys' many Handsome Jack posters.

"Rhys," he said, looking up to meet the young man's stare. "You look tired." 

"Um, thanks?" 

"I was just admiring your workspace. You are uh..." Henderson cut his eyes to the posters again. "Quite devoted to your work, I see." 

Rhys could feel the blush begin to creep across his face. "Is there something I can help you with, sir?"

Henderson walked up and handed Rhys a sheet of paper with some Hyperion letterhead Rhys hadn't seen before. 

"It's a letter requesting your presence at R&D. Says to be there today at three."

Rhys took the letter and read it, there wasn't much:

> _Rhys,_
> 
> _Your presence is requested at the entrance to R &D today at 1500. You will be evaluated for an open position in the Hyperion Corporation. Attendance is mandatory. Do not be late. _
> 
> _Thank you,_
> 
> _A._

"Um...who sent this? What job are they talking about? Who is A?" Rhys' head already hurt, and this was not helping. Also something about the letter was sending his finely-tuned Corporation B.S. radar off the charts.

"I'm not sure, and frankly, it's above your pay grade." Henderson was already turning to leave. "All I know is that this was sent by the higher-ups. That you can trust."

"But what about my project? The Hyperion Countermeasure System?" 

"Figure it out!" And before Rhys could reply, Henderson was already walking away back to his office. 

Letter still in-hand, Rhys plopped back into his desk, muttering angrily. He looked at his watch. He had just over an hour and a half before he was expected to be at R&D, so he figured he should go ahead and get lunch and head over. He didn't find himself in that part of Helios often, so he wanted to make sure he could build in time in case he got lost. He switched on his ECHOnet to text Vaughn and Yvette.

R: We still on for drinks tn? I have had the weirdest day…

V: Count me in. I could use a stiff one.

Y: Gross. 

V: Drink! A stiff drink you perv. 

Y: Ur the one saying he wants a stiff one. And yeah I'm in.

Rhys huffed a little laugh. He'd miss those two after the inevitable airlocking or being-eat-by-a-radioactive-skag event he was sure would come of this R&D venture. But if he was going to die, he'd rather go out having been punctual, so he shut down his desktop and made his way to grab a quick bite before his mystery meeting.

________

When he got to the R&D entrance, he hit the call button next to the door. 

"Uh, hello. This is Rhys. I was told to go to come to R&D, but I'm not totally sure where."

He waited for a beat before the voice of a young lady responded. "Hello, Rhys. I've been expecting you."

The formidable metal doors slid open. "Come in. I've sent the exact location of our room to your Echo," the woman said. Rhys followed his Echo's directions through the winding sequence of rocket bays and glass-walled habitats until he reached a small door tucked away at the edge of the facility. 

The voice re-appeared this time inside Rhys' head instead of the R&D speaker system. "You can go in." 

"Whoa! Are you in my head? How did you do that?" Rhys looked around, but no one was nearby. 

"Sorry to frighten you. My name is Angel, and I am an AI working on behalf of Hyperion. I have access to the entire Hyperion network, and today I have been tasked with your evaluation." 

"Uh..for what exactly?" 

"Sorry," the female voice said, sounding actually apologetic "I can't tell you unless you're selected."

"Right…" Rhys said. Still looking around for cameras but seeing none. 

The doors to the room slid open. 

_Guess that's my queue._

Rhys stepped into the room. The first thing he noticed was the color. The room was black and covered in large square tiles that glowed like TV screens when nothing is playing, but the TV is still on. Little chords of white light zipped around the floors, walls, and ceiling with a faint hum of constant movement. 

"Welcome, Rhys. This is the simulation room. You may have heard of Hyperion's previous work in holostructing fighters."

Being the little obsessive fanboy he was, Rhys had read a ton on the Digi-Jacks that Handsome Jack himself had coded before he saved Elpis and opened his first vault. Shoving down the desire to express precisely how much he knew, Rhys just nodded. 

"R&D has been working to advance that holo technology and create near real-life simulations for a variety of functions. This room is primarily used to run combat scenarios for Hyperion defense personnel, but today we'll be using it to run you through a series of situations. Please just respond however you best feel is appropriate."

Rhys had about a million questions, but the room was already starting to shift. In almost the blink of an eye, the room went entirely black, the squares no longer visible, and the light was entirely gone. It would all be one giant void if not for the large grid on the floor spaced out into seven columns. Next to the grid were a series of blocks, all in varying lengths and colors. Rhys reached down a grabbed one. He was shocked to find it had dimension and weight to it. 

"Whoa. Okay, that's cool…" he marveled for a bit flipped it over in his hands. Then he dropped it down into the grid in the first row. A flash of green lit up the floor. "Guess that means it was good." Rhys then proceeded to try out the various blocks in different arrangements and combinations until it all fit in the grid. And a light dinging noise echoed in the room.

"Thank you, Rhys. We'll be moving to the next simulation now."

Once again, the room shifted. This time Rhys found himself in a grand ballroom. People snapped into existence and started shuffling past him. They were all wearing beautiful gowns and expensive suits. Rhys could smell the perfume off of some of them and hear the smart snap of heels on marble tile. Everyone's face was covered by a simple black mask, and the room grew louder and louder as more people shuffled into the room out of thin air. Smelling the air again, Rhys caught a faint scent of gunpowder. 

"Hey you, legs." A man's voice called out to Rhys. "Grab me a drink and meet back up with me in a bit. Gotta go talk to some morons real quick." 

Rhys whirled around to try to find who was calling to him but only managed to see the back the man's head as he walked away. Before Rhys could get to him, a surge of people passed between them, leaving the man time to vanish.

_Okay, Rhys focus. Get the drink first. Worry about finding the man with the worryingly sexy voice second._

He looked around and spotted the bar. Rhys made it to the front through the crowd and ordered a whiskey on the rocks. Personally, Rhys was a fan of drinks that didn't taste like burning. But he thought ordering his usual pomegranate martini for the mystery man might cost him some manly points. 

The bartender served Rhys the drink who couldn't help but take a tiny sip. "Bleh! Ugh, nope. Even the virtual version of this tastes horrible…" Looking up, Rhys scanned the room trying to find a back of a head that seemed familiar.

"Shit." The room probably had over a hundred people in it now. Everyone was talking and moving all over, making it near impossible to systematically eliminate people. Rhys was getting overwhelmed. 

_Alright. It's time to think. We only know that this guy is brunette and smells like gunpowder. Let's work with that._

So Rhys did the only thing he could think of and started sniffing around. Literally. He went up the groups and casually pretended to join in small talk while systematically getting close and smelling them. 

"Mm good point. Lunch is an underrated meal." *inhale* 

_Too sweet._

"You know I _do_ think space is beautiful." *inhale*

_Mothballs._

"Mmhm" 

_Flowery_

"Yeah" 

_Fruity_

"Wow, you don't say." 

*deep breath*

_Burnt toast_

No luck. Rhys started to think he'd never find the mystery man. And then, out of nowhere, a hand slid across the small of Rhys' back to rest of his hip. "Hey, pumpkin. Got my drink?" The smell of gunpowder returned, but it was stronger now. Rhys turned to lock eyes with a face he'd spent far too much time looking at. Handsome Jack was staring straight at Rhys who was frozen in place. Jack took the glass from Rhys' hands and put it to his lips before taking a slip in one smooth motion. 

Managing to regain minimal brain function Rhys sputtered out, "Uh um, hello Handsome Jack, sir." 

_It's not real. It's not real. It's not real._

Jack smiled, taking off the black mask to leave behind just the one usual mask of white. 

"Looks like someone forgot his mask. Come here." Not-Jack set his glass down on a nearby table and held the black mask up to Rhys' face. "Hold this here." Rhys' auto-pilot took over, and he held the mask steady to his face. Jack leaned in inches away from Rhys as he reached around to tie the mask on. Rhys could feel the bigger man's heat radiating off his skin and couldn't help but breathe in deeply. 

Jack leaned away, the mask now secure. "Looking good, hot stuff. Let's dance."

"Um, what?" But Jack was already pulling Rhys to the middle of the dance floor. A song was ending as Jack took his right hand and placed it on Rhys' hip while using his other hand to hold Rhys' mechanical one. "I uh, I'm not really much of a dancer", Rhys said lamely. 

"That's okay. I'm friggin amazing at it, so I can just be good enough for both of us." 

Rhys wanted to roll his eyes but didn't get the chance before the music started back up again, and they were off.

"Ahhhck!" Rhys near fell forward as he moved backward, holding onto his dance partner in a vice grip on his shoulder. 

Jack laughed, and it was warm and light. Despite being at his expense, that laugh did things to Rhys he couldn't be thinking about in a job interview. 

"Come on, dum-dum. Keep up." He pulled Rhys a little closer. "Just follow my lead. I mean, that's just great advice all the time, but really right now. It's just a step back, a step to the side, then close your feet together again." 

Rhys tried the steps and found it wasn't that bad. Staring at his feet, he started to get the hang of it.

_Back. Side. Close._

_Back. Slide. Close._

"Hey, starting to get a little lonely up here." Jack dipped his head down to catch Rhys' gaze. 

Rhys flushed and looked out to the side to avoid the intensity of the other man's attention. Jack laughed again, and it was doing nothing to help Rhys keep his composure. 

They were making their way around the ballroom, and slowly the edges of the room started to go fuzzy. All other noise except the slow, soft music in the background faded away. Then almost as if the room had exhaled, it was only Jack and Rhys dancing close together. 

Rhys closed his eyes and leaned in just a little so his head was almost resting on the top of Jack's chest.

_Oh. So this is what it's_ _like_.

Wanting to be frozen in that moment forever, Rhys' heart stopped at the sound of a soft whirring. "Time's up, pumpkin." And suddenly Jack was gone. Rhys looked up to find he was holding nothing, and the smell of gunpowder was no longer there. 

He was back in the empty black-tiled room. 

Angel's voice shocked him back to reality. "Thank you, Rhys. You'll be receiving a notification in the next few days if you've moved on to the next round."

Rhys couldn't see himself, but he didn't need to in order to know that he was red with embarrassment. "Oh, uh, yes. Thank you." 

The doors to the room slid open, and Rhys walked out. 

"Do you require help navigating the exit to R&D?" the voice asked politely. 

"Nope. I-I got it from here. Thanks anyway." Rhys shuffled back down the way he came. 

_Thank god Angel is just an AI. I think I'd die if a real person saw that…_

______

Angel sat back in her hub, reviewing Rhys' actions on her many screens. 

"Interesting…" 


	2. Pomegranate Princess

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Rhys tries to explain to the gang what happened and also tries not to think about how hot his boss is.
> 
> Enjoy!

The gang met at their usual place for post-work drinks. Yvette was the first to discover their new go-to bar and found it to be both lively but not overly popular. Perfection. 

Rhys was the last to get there, still shaking off the whiplash of going from a state of intense coding focus to getting felt up by a holo version of his idol and boss. Yeah. He was going to need a lot of alcohol. 

"Rhys, hey!" Vaughn called out. "What's up, bro?"

Rhys walked over to the table Vaughn and Yvette were at and pulled up a seat. 

"Whoa, guys. I have had a D-A-Y," Rhys said. He was racking his brain for where to even begin.

Yvette nodded, feeling an intense day-sharing was about to commence. "Message received. I'll be back with drinks." Yvette got up to grab a round from the bar. When she got back, she put a rum cocktail with fruit shavings in front of Rhys. "For you, pomegranate princess." 

Rhys hissed internally at the shot to his ego, but the drink was delicious.

"Okay, so you know how I've been working on that countermeasure systems update? I was in the middle of coding it today, and Henderson comes out of nowhere with a letter telling me to show up at R&D for a job interview." Rhys continued. "And, get this, the letter doesn't say who it's from. All Henderson will tell me is that it from the 'higher-ups.'"

"That's strange, Rhys. Why would you go to R&D for a job interview?" Yvette's eyes squinted in suspicion. 

"And what job?" Vaugh asked. 

"Exactly! No clue! So I show up to R&D, and an AI I've never heard of before called 'Angel' starts talking to me through my ECHO eye saying she works for Hyperion."

He waits for his friends to cut in again, but they are just staring at him in deep confusion. 

_ Buckle up, guys. It's only going to get weirder. _

"So, the AI leads me to something she called a 'simulation room,' and when I walked in, the room totally transformed. Like it created holograms that you could touch and interact with just as if it was real. Actually, I'm dying to know how the room projects light in a way that makes matter capab-"

"Rhys!" They both whisper-shout.

"Right! Sorry, sorry. Back to the room. So, the room starts running me through a series of what I think were tests. I had to solve a puzzle with blocks, then I had to find someone in a crowd, and then I uh had to um...dance."

Yvette paused. "Sorry, come again? You had to what?"

Rhys was rubbing the back of his neck with his flesh hand and tried again. "I, uh, I maybe had to do a little dancing…" 

Vaugh immediately busts out laughing. "Hahahaha, okay. You're fucking with us. Nice. Good one, Rhys. I was maybe with you through the magic illusion room," he said, waving his hands around in the air for emphasis "But dancing?"

Rhys was blushing for like the tenth time that day. "It's true! I don't know why, but part of the test was like a fancy-schmancy ballroom dance." Vaughn and Yvette were still snickering pretty openly by the end of that sentence, so Rhys stood up.

"Fine. I'll prove it." He stood up next to the table and raised his arms in the same position he remembered from earlier. 

"Uhh what are you doing?" Vaughn asked. Rhys ignored him and continued. 

_ You can do this, Rhys. It's just back, side, close.  _

_ Back. Side. Close. _

And sure enough, Rhys began waltzing through a Hyperion dive bar. He completed the simple steps a few times before looking back up to his table. He saw Yvette and Vaugh had stopped laughing, but now the other groups in the bar who had seen him were giggling quietly. 

"Whoa, okay, bro. I believe you."

"Thank you," Rhys huffed a little indignantly before sitting back down. 

"Any idea why those were your tests? Was there anything out of the ordinary about them?" Yvette asked.

_ DontThinkAboutJackDontThinkAboutJackDontThinkAboutJackDontThinkAboutJack _

"Nah," he said, over-extending the 'ah' in an effort to be casual and leaned back in his chair, avoiding eye contact. "Not really." 

Vaughn's eyebrows were knitted together in thought. "Strange, man. Do you know when you'll know how you did?"

Rhys took his drink and swirled the liquid in the glass. "All Angel said was that I'd hear in a few days if I moved on to the next round. Whatever that is."

"Hmm." Vaughn was clearly still troubled. "I dunno, man. This whole thing still screams 'airlock' to me."

"Yeah, I'm going to have to agree with Vaughn on that," Yvette said. 

"Guys!" Rhys objected, and the others seemed to focus up a little. "I'm just a little freaked out. But I don't think I'm getting murdered... I'm 95 percent sure of it. In fact, I've been gunning for a promotion for forever in data-mining. Maybe it's just a really new eval process," he finished. 

There was a bit of a pause. "If you say so," Yvette said. Ever the realist. 

___________________________

After the gang had wrapped up their night out, Vaughn and Rhys broke off from Yvette to head back to their apartment. 

When they got home, the boys promptly started to shed their shoes and ties and headed straight for the couch. It was time to just veg-out and not worry about work, or projects, or being obsessed with your boss' boss' boss.

They were about halfway through a movie about sea monsters fighting vampires when Vaughn started to shift uncomfortably. 

_ Uh oh. He's got the I-want-to-ask-you-something face.  _

Rhys tried to pretend he hadn't noticed and forced himself to stare straight at the TV where a mermaid was fighting a bat.

_ Note to self - stop letting Vaughn choose the movies. _

"Hey, uh Rhys," Vaughn looked over. "We're bros, right?"

"Mhmm," Rhys said. Still locking eyes with the screen. "Best bros."

"Well, I mean, I know you told us what happened today, but I'm getting this strange feeling like maybe you left some stuff out..." he finished softly. 

The back of Rhys' neck started to warm, and he could feel his heart rate speed up. "Uh um, what makes you say that, buddy?"

Rhys finally broke and looked over to Vaughn. His friend's face was earnest and concerned, and Rhys knew he was in trouble. 

"Listen, I mean, if you don't feel like you can tell me, I'll drop it. I just want you to know I'm here, man." 

_ Aw man. I'm the worst. _

Rhys sighed and reached over to pause the movie. 

"Listen, Vaughn, what I'm about to tell you, it can never be repeated."

"Not even to Yvette?"

" _ Especially  _ not to Yvette." 

Rhys leaned in, and Vaughn leaned in as well. Despite no one else being in the apartment, Rhys felt he could only whisper what he was about to say. "So," he said, his face cupping the side of his mouth as continued whispering, "my simulation may have contained a little bit of getting hit on by Handsome Jack." 

_ And it was really, really hot. _

"Duuuuude!"

"I know!" 

Vaughn leaned back and put his head in his hands. "Um, so you're saying you got hit on by a simulated version of THE Handsome Jack for a job interview while an AI watched?"

"Whoa," it sounded even crazier when he heard it out loud. "Yeah, I mean, I guess that is what I'm saying."

"That must have been terrifying. Did you try to run away?"

Rhys was deathly silent as he just stared at Vaughn before making his I' m-so-sorry-please-don't-be-mad eyes. 

"You liked it!?" Vaughn gasped out in realization. "DUUUUUUUUDE!"

"I know! I know." Rhys began to ramble. "It just all happened so fast. He wanted a drink, and he smelled really great, and then he started dancing with me and being all charming and stuff."

Vaughn stared at Rhys in shock before he laughed and sat back on the couch. "Man, I knew you looked up to him and all, but I thought it was just like in a professional way…"

"It still is! Or...it was. I don't know." Rhys slumped back into the couch as well. "It wasn't even the real Handsome Jack. It doesn't mean anything."

"Uh, it kinda sounds like it means you have the hots for our boss, bro."

"...Okay yeah, I guess it does mean that." Rhys rubbed his eyes. "Nothing I can do about it now except wait to see if I moved to the next round."

"If this job is to like be in a Handsome Jack harem, I'll find a way to get you off Helios."

_ A harem is bad… right? Like...that would be...bad... _

Vaughn watched Rhys weigh it out in his head and wrinkled his nose, "Aw, dude gross. Please don't become a prostitute for Handsome Jack."

"Okay, chill. That's not going to happen…probably."

Vaughn shuddered, but straightened his glasses and looked back up at Rhys. 

"Hey, well, whatever happens, I have your back, Rhys." 

Rhys' heart swelled a little. He really did have the best bro in the universe. "Thanks, man." They gave each other a quick manly hug before resuming the movie.

______________________________

  
  


Two days passed before Rhys received another letter. 

> _ Dear Rhys, _
> 
> _ Congratulations. Your performance in the previous assessment has merited an advancement through the interview process. Return to the entrance of R&D tomorrow at 0800. Attendance is mandatory. Do not be late. _
> 
> _ Thank you, _
> 
> _ A. _

_ Hurray?? _

Honestly, Rhys wasn't sure how to feel. The rational part of his brain knew this was odd, even for Hyperion. But the other thirstier side of his mind was excited at the possibility of living through more fantasies with his all-time idol and boss. Either way, the decision was out of his hands. All he knew that he was going to be at R&D bright and early the next day—ready for anything.

When he got home, he couldn't stop thinking about how the holo Jack had held him or how he smelled like gunmetal and sex and whiskey. And as Rhys got ready for bed, he tried to think about something else, anything else and chastised himself when it didn't quite work

_ Don't think about sex with your boss, Rhys. _

And, to his credit, he managed not to as he fell asleep. But dreaming about it...well, that was just out of his control, right?

___________________________

The next morning, Rhys walked briskly through the streets of Helios on his way to the nearest shuttle station. Helios was enormous, and the most reliable way to get anywhere was via sky shuttle. He checked the time on his ECHO and nodded in satisfaction.

_ 7:20 AM. Perfect. I'll be there 10 minutes early.  _

He wasn't sure what to expect, but he had dressed smartly. Having chosen his outfit the night before, Rhys walked confidently into the station in his pressed slacks, a crisp white shirt, a red tie, and his lucky striped socks with stars on the ankles. 

Checking the shuttle listings on his ECHO eye, Rhys arrived at platform HL-73 at exactly 7:30 AM. His transport would be there in 10 minutes, and then it would be a quick ride to R&D. Waiting for it to arrive, Rhys started scrolling through the ECHOnet casually shopping for socks. A soft cry shook his attention. 

Over to his right, Rhys looked and saw a girl who couldn't have been older than eight sitting in the middle of the platform crying. He looked around, but the other Hyperion employees were ignoring the girl and shuffling around her place on the floor. Rhys rechecked his ECHO. It was only a few minutes until the shuttle would arrive. 

_ Fuck fuck fuck _

"Hey, uh, little girl," Rhys walked over tentatively to the girl. "Where are your parents?" 

The girl looked up. She was hiccuping through her words. "I-I-I don't know," she sniffed. Time was ticking away, and Rhys looked up desperately at the tracks. 

"Hey, hey, don't cry. It's okay." The girl was still visibly upset and covering her face with her hands. 

Rhys heard the rumble of the shuttle. The letter's demand " _ Do not be late" _ was ringing in the back of his head as the shuttle pulled in, and the doors opened.

_ Damn. Not good. _

Rhys looked down and saw the girl and then looked back over to the shuttle where people were now entering. He heard a light ding to signify the doors were about to close. He looked back down and saw the girl was wearing socks with purple hearts dotting along the ankle down into her shoe.

Rhys took a deep breath and sighed. He heard the shuttle pull away as he plopped down next to the girl. "Hey," he said softly. "I like your socks." 

The girl rubbed her eyes and looked at her socks. Rhys then proceeded to pull his leg close and took off one of his shoes, exposing his own patterned feet. The girl saw them, and the crying dulled to a soft sniffle. "Do you like them? I think they're pretty fancy." Rhys wiggled his toes for emphasis.

At that, the girl giggled and nodded. "I didn't know adults had fun socks." 

Rhys snorted a little. "Ah, well, only the cool ones do." People around them were now actively staring at Rhys in either judgment or confusion. "So, I forgot to ask, but what is your name?"

The girl looked down, shyly at her hands. "It's Mila." 

"Hi. Mila. My name is Rhys."

Mila just nodded. She had stopped crying all together now.

"Hey Mila, do you know where your parents work?" 

Rubbing her nose with the back of her wrist, the girl nodded. "Yeah. My mommy works in 'margetting.'"

"I see, thank you."

From there, Rhys asked Mila for her mother's name and used his ECHO to call over to the marketing department. Mila's mom had been forced to take Mila to work that day, and the two got separated in a morning rush at the shuttle station where Mila's mother had mistakenly thought her daughter had already gotten on to one of the transports. Rhys waited with the girl until her mother arrived. The mom thanked Rhys profusely and grabbed Mila's hand to head back on one of the shuttles. Rhys waved through the glass of the closing doors as it carted the girl and her mom away, and the girl waved back. 

Rhys checked his ECHO. It was 7:55 AM. 

_ Shit.  _

He took the next shuttle to R&D, and as soon as the doors opened at their destination, he made a mad dash down through the station to the R&D entrance. His normally quaffed hair was flying all over the place, and he could feel the sweat start to form on his forehead. When he reached the large metal doors, he came to a staggering halt, panting and putting his metal hand on his thigh as he hunched over, breathing hard. He checked the time - 8:06 AM.

The AI's voice came to Rhys again through his ECHO eye.

"Hello, Rhys." The woman's voice came softly.

"Just got done...running...sorry... can't speak...so quickly now," Rhys wheezed out. 

"It's okay." And Rhys could've sworn he heard a laugh, "Please catch your breath. I'm worried you'll pass out."

Rhys enthusiastically took her up on that offer and stopped to suck down air into his lungs. When his breathing finally leveled out, he looked back at the door. "I'm really sorry I'm late. There was a girl who was lost and I had to wait for her mom and it took a long time an-"

"Rhys, it's okay. I saw."

_ Oh right. Hyperion network. Duh. _

"Ah," he said. "Does that mean I'm cut from the evaluation?"

"No. I think I've come to my decision."

Rhys' heart started to speed back up again. 

Did Angel sound almost...enthusiastic?

_ Could an AI be enthusiastic? _

"Congratulations, Rhys. You have been selected for the position."

Rhys' eyes widened, and he pumped his mechanical fist into the air. "Hell yeah!" He then paused, feeling embarrassed. "....wait, um, do I get to know what the position is now?"

"Oh, of course! Sorry, I should have mentioned that with the 'congratulations' bit. You, Rhys, will be the new personal assistant to CEO and President of the Hyperion Corporation - Handsome Jack."

All the air left Rhys's lungs again, and he barely registered the faint call of Angel's voice as his legs gave out. His body connected with the floor, and Angel's voice became further and further away as everything went to black.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The fun begins!! I promise a LOT more Jack in the next chapter. And I am planning on a rating increase pretty soon, so just keep that in mind if you want to stick around.
> 
> Really hope you're enjoying it so far! <3


	3. Sleeping Beauty

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Jack gives Rhys a ride to work

____ Angel ____

Angel knew that Rhys wasn't exactly a tough man  _ per se _ . She'd studied all the available information she could find about the man, and while she knew he was ambitious and didn't take shit from idiots, he wasn't a shoot-em-up-cowboy type. 

What she didn't account for, however, was him to pass out in broad daylight. 

_ Shoot. Not great.  _

She looked at Rhys and how the people on the platform just walked around his unconscious body. Helios workers were desensitized to cold-blooded murder. A man passing out hardly registered for them on the Hyperion-Scale-Of-Fucked-Up-Stuff. 

_ Okay, gotta think. _

Angel ran pale fingers through black hair as she stared at her screens. She knew she'd have to tell Jack. No one else knew about her, and it would be odd for an AI to randomly announce to Helios that a twiggy data worker passed out on a transport platform to get assistance.

"This is not the introduction I was hoping for…" she grumbled and called up her father. 

____ Jack ____

Jack enjoyed going to R&D. It had that whiff of danger he craved while at the same time being under his total control. Currently walking through their experimental arms division to play with the new prototypes, Jack imagined all the new ways to kill bandits. Most involved individual torture, but that took a lot of time, so the new hyper-accurate gun line he was toying with would do for now. 

He was currently lighting off a round from one of their new SMGs in the shooting range when he got a call from his Angel. 

"Hey, baby girl. What's up?" He reached over to his Echo to focus on the call. All of the scientists and researchers who had followed behind him previously as he toured the prototypes hadn't followed him inside the range. Handsome Jack didn't need any help firing his goddamn guns.

"Uh, hey. So are you almost finished with the guns?"

"Almost. Why? Someone need an airlockin'? I can make time for that." He grinned.

"For the millionth time, I don't think anyone really ever  _ needs an airlockin' _ . I just maybe need a little help with a personnel matter."

Jack groaned. "Is it that PA stuff? Listen, honey, if you couldn't find someone, it's not that big a deal. Handsome Jack is good-to-go and does it solo." He switched over to a corrosive pistol and nailed a dummy in the head for emphasis. 

"..." 

"I couldn't see it, but I sensed some eye-rolling." 

"I think I should maybe not comment."

Jack grumbled. He was so unappreciated as a badass by his daughter. 

Angel tried again. "So, um, about that PA stuff. I hired one for you! Obviously, you'll have to approve, but I have made my choice."

"Woopie," Jack whirled his index finger in a small circle. "When do I get to meet your mystery person?"

"Yeah, about that. I kinda need some help with that. He might have passed out on a transport platform a minute ago, and needs someone to go get him…"

"Haha, you friggin serious? He get hit in the head or something?" Jack was packing up his equipment and heading for the door. 

"Something like that…" Angel said.

"Okay, well, I'll have someone go get him."

"Actually," Angel cut in quickly, "could you go get him?" She noticed Jack's face of confusion mixed with annoyance and continued. "I just think it would be nice to go meet him now. He's  _ really _ excited to meet you." A little ego stroking never hurt. 

Jack weighed it out in his head before acquiescing. "Sheesh. Okay, whatever. If it’s that important to you."

"Thank you, Jack. Sending his location to your Echo now."

"Yeah, yeah, I'm the best. You're just lucky I was finishing up here anyway." Jack walked through R&D and got in his private transport with guards. The car was self-driving, and Jack sent it the location he'd obtained from Angel. He relaxed back in his seat and realized he hadn't even gotten his potential PA's name. 

_ This is such a pain. I should be shooting stuff...or getting laid...or shooting stuff while getting laid. _

But Jack had a hard time telling Angel no to the small stuff. He wasn't unaware that being kept in a containment sector was not an ideal environment for a teenager, but his girl was...special. He was going to make her life as good as it could be. That life was just not going to be moving anywhere he didn't want it, that's all. So if his girl wanted a friend to work with as she pretended to be an AI while helping Jack, you know...whatever. 

When they parked alongside the platform, Jack snapped his fingers at the two guards inside the limo-like car. "Hey, dum-dums. Go find the guy passed out over there and bring him in."

The two Hyperion guards shuffled out the car, and when they came back, there was a man between them with his arms over their shoulders. They dumped Rhys in a seat across from Jack's and returned to the far side of the car's cabin. 

The man was slumped over to one side jostling slightly as the car began to move again, but Jack could see he was a tall, brunette man with a metal arm.

_ Robot arm. Rather bitchin, but nothing too crazy.  _

The hair was a little disheveled, and that skinny tie was god awful, but overall the man seemed normal enough.

_ But why this guy? Angel seemed to like him… _

"Hey, princess." Jack bent over and patted Rhys' cheeks with some light slapping. "Time to wake up, sleeping beauty."

Rhys stirred and opened his eyes slowly. "Whaaa, huh?" He said, rubbing his eyes and looking around before settling in on Jack. 

Jack smirked at the jaw-dropping done by the younger man.

_ Ah, that never gets old. _

Jack began to say something when the transport turned sharply to the left, and everything went flying. Drinks, pens, and PAs were all sent hurling to the other side of the vehicle. But one didn't get to be CEO of Hyperion and take out droves of bandits without killer reflexes. 

"Oof," Jack let out as he caught the lanky man by the arms. The car stopped with a bit of a screech. Still holding onto the front of the man, Jack barked at his guards. "What the hell was that? What do I pay you for? Out! Out! Go find out what that was!"

The guards scrambled through the car, still disoriented from the sudden turn and tripping over each other. As they left, Jack turned his attention back to the man in front of him whose eyes were now fully open and staring up at Jack.

_ Whoa.  _

The first thing Jack noticed was that Rhys' eyes were two different colors like his own. One was brown and the other was a lighter pale color before all of a sudden turning to a shocking shade of blue. 

_ An Echo eye _ . 

The man looked up at Jack and blinked before his Echo eye powered down. The eye returning to its normal color, almost like it had been rebooted. 

"Wh-where am I? Is this real?" And with that, the younger man started touching around the car before hesitantly lifting a hand to Jack's face.

Jack's eyes widened as he watched the scene. He almost let the kid touch him too before he snapped back to his senses. 

Whoa there, kiddo." He caught Rhys' wrist before the hand could make contact. "Hands off the merchandise." Jack shot his trademark smirk as he pushed Rhys back into his side of the car. 

Rhys sat back with a soft thump and ran a hand through his hair. He blinked a few times before it all came back to him. "Oh...oh my god. You're Handsome Jack. And I tried to touch you…" 

Jack snorted. "Yes and yes, kiddo. But I mean, who can blame you? Look at me. I'm gorgeous."

The other man's cheeks flushed slightly, and he avoided making eye contact with Jack. 

_ Shy type, huh? That can be fun. _

Jack was starting to get interested. 

"You got a name, sleeping beauty?" 

"Yes, Mr. Handsome Jack, Sir. My name is Rhys."

"And you want to be 'ole Jack's personal assistant, huh? Think you can handle keeping up with me? Not afraid of a few assassination attempts or getting into a shootout?"

"I'd do my best, sir." The man was still staring at the floor, looking a little paler.

"Well, I guess you can't be a total wimp. Echo eye surgery is not an easy operation. I know some real horror stories on that one. Guys who've just gone mad from the pain or the job got botched real bad, and now they are about as high functioning as a Claptrap who interfaced with a wall socket."

Rhys didn't say anything in response and just nodded in acknowledgment. 

Jack could see his guards walking back to the car through the windows behind Rhys. 

"Well, at least you aren't ugly. No tits, but cute in like a lanky, nerdy kinda way. Not my type, but nice to look at."

Rhys' eyes widened, and he shifted uncomfortably, staring intently down at his hands to hide his reddening face.

_ Haha, okay, that's going to be fun. _

The two guards clambered back inside the cabin. "Sir, we found what happened. A malfunctioning cargo transport cut us off. Not sure why it malfunctioned, though. They are all operated through the Hyperion Network."

_ That's...odd. _

Jack decided it wasn't worth delving into at the moment. Not when he had a shiny new PA to torture sitting right across from him. "Whatever. Let's go back to the office. Rhysie here needs a tour." He shot a devilish smile to the brunette who immediately blushed and looked away. 

  
  


____ Rhys ____

  
  


_ Shit. Shit. Shit. I tried to touch the CEO of Hyperion. Ugh, I am so stupid.  _

Rhys fretted the entire walk from Jack's personal transport to the private elevator. The elevator, while for Jack's use only, was smaller than the public access lift. Jack went in first, ushering Rhys beside him, followed by the two guards. Rhys was hyper-aware of how close he was to his idol and now direct superior. He could feel his heart rate begin to speed and took a deep breath through his nose to calm down—big mistake. 

_ Oh, wow, he smells perfect. Just like before, but better and real.  _

Jack smelled earthy like smoke and toasted wood. Rhys swallowed and willed himself to be less excited. Silently he repeated  _ Be cool. Be cool.  _ In his head as they got out and stepped into Jack's office.

The group walked out and Rhys felt his jaw drop. "This is amazing..." He walked forward did a full 360 to see the entirety of the massive office. "I'd heard the rumors, but this place is just huge and I can’t believe I get to be here." Rhys turned back to see Jack just smirking at him. 

_ What happened to 'be cool' you idiot. _

Jack walked past Rhys toward his desk, which was impressive in its own right. "Don't let me stop you, princess. Take it in." The guards walked outside Jack’s office, presumably, to stand guard as the two continued. 

Rhys was a little red, but he carried surveying the space. While the enormous busts of Jack's face were a bit much, the rest of the office was fantastic. There were water features on both ends of the room connected by a river that ran under a section of clear glass floor. Rhys looked down to see koi fish swim lazily under his feet. The ceiling was ridiculously high, and ornate wooden shelves lined the edges of the room with various objects and what Rhys thought might be keepsakes. 

The curious man began walking around the perimeter of the room as Jack decided to truly start figuring out who the hell his new PA was. "So Rhys, other than having a stupid name, what else do you have going on?" 

Rhys bristled slightly at the insult, but he wasn't big on suicide, so he ignored the jab. "I was in data mining. My project, or rather my former project, was to create the new countermeasure features for the Hyperion bases."

That seemed to catch Jack's attention. "So you're not just a face. Good, I don't have time for idiots." If Jack saw Rhys blush, he didn't say anything. "Listen, code monkey. I'm going to give you a shot. My AI seems to think I could benefit from a PA. Me? I'm not so sure, but I created my AI, so either way, I'm right. That being said, if you can't keep up, you're gone." 

It wasn't lost on Rhys how Jack jerked his head over to an airlock chamber when ending his last sentence. 

"Yes, Sir. I understand." Rhys gulped down air, almost forgetting to breathe. 

"Yeah, yeah. And enough with the 'sir' business. Call me, Jack. Although Lord of Hyperion and Master of the Universe is also acceptable." Jack smiled at his narcissism. 

"Will do," Rhys paused but saw Jack look at him expectantly. "Jack." He finished

Jack clapped his hands together "Atta boy. Now let's get to work." 

___________________________

The rest of Rhys' day consisted of setting up his desk stationed at the front of Jack's enormous office and getting acquainted with Jack's calendar. Turns out, the CEO of the galaxy’s biggest company was pretty darn busy. 

Angel popped in through his Echo to help Rhys with the set-up and walked him through the job's primary duties, which ultimately boiled down to "anticipate all of Jack's needs, wants, and desires before he does and fulfill them."

_ No pressure. Just be a human mind reader. _

Rhys was starting to feel worried. He was quick, but the learning curve was going to be rough. Jack was famous for his unpredictability and short temper. Not messing up seemed almost impossible. 

Angel must have sensed Rhys' anxiety and spoke to him. "Hey, it'll be okay. I'll be here to help you with Jack. If you want to know something about him, all you need to do is ask." 

Rhys felt calmer after that. "Thank you, Angel. I have about a million questions." Rhys spent the next hour learning the details about his boss' likes, dislikes, and weird obsessions. He couldn' believe he was getting paid to live out his sick fanboy passion, and learning information about Handsome Jack that others would kill for. If his life wasn't at stake, he might have enjoyed it more, but beggars can't be choosers and all that.

"Okay, just so I get those last few facts down, you're telling me Jack's right hand shakes just before he shoots someone, he loves breakfast food, and he hates going to meetings on time?" 

"The hand thing is a subconscious desire to shoot someone, so just be on the lookout for that." 

"Right, got it." Rhys was typing out a small file to save in his eye's memory to review for later. 

"That should be enough to get you through the first week. I have to go now. Pandora is experiencing a few bandit issues. But feel free to call should you need help."

“Thank you, Angel.” Rhys' chest warmed a little. He knew she was an AI, but Angel was so lovely. It seemed almost ludicrous that someone like Jack had created something so pleasant. Even though she was a program, Rhys was determined to try and not bother her. He was going to get through this week as best he could on his own. Turning back to his computer, he noticed that Jack was scheduled to be at a defense meeting 15 minutes ago. 

_ Perfect. Just late enough _ . 

He hopped out of his desk and started printing out materials for the meeting. Looking on the agenda, he saw his old project listed as one of the items and sighed a little. He'd miss coding. Being the CEO's PA was undoubtedly a step-up, but he liked the pressure of being in the trenches and finding creative workarounds. 

Jack had stepped out for another matter almost half an hour ago, but Rhys heard the slight ding of the office elevator before Jack re-entered. He got out the lift and walked over to his desk, rifling through reports. Rhys tried to hide his staring. It was still a little surreal, and everything had happened so quickly. From passing out to waking up in his boss' (and man of his dreams') arms to organizing a schedule...today was going to go down as one of the stranger ones Rhys had ever had.

"Hey, legs. Stop ogling the goods and tell me what's next for today."

_ Fuck. _

"Right, you are scheduled to be at a defense meeting. They started about 20 minutes ago." 

"Got it. Might as well pop in. Make sure those geniuses aren't screwing up my life's work by letting bandits make my bases their living hellhole of a playground." He strode by Rhys, who was already facing the elevator and slapped him on the ass. "Move it, kiddo. We've got some planning to do."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Another chapter down *makes fingers guns* Pew! Pew!
> 
> I'm having a good time writing this, so I hope you're enjoying it too. I'm just such a slut for shy Rhys, but he'll get ballsier, don't worry!

**Author's Note:**

> Please stay safe and healthy!


End file.
